A time for thanks….

Thanksgiving…

A time for giving thanks…

A time for being with family…

A time for eating…

A time for celebrating…

A time for relaxing…

A time for indulgences…

A time for love…

On this Thanksgiving morning, I am moved to tears. Why? Because I’m so thankful for all of the above. I’m so thankful for today and for life in general. I’m thankful to get to cook and bake up a storm – even foods I can’t eat. I’m thankful I get to see our families. I’m so thankful that I get to eat – even if it’s not that traditional dinner I grew up with. I’m so thankful I can celebrate our blessings with the ones we love most. I’m so thankful for the idea of relaxing… as I know I won’t actually relax. You can bet I will enjoy a few extra bites of my “Courtney-friendly” pumpkin pie. I’m so thankful for the love that my family, friends and all of you have shown to me this last year.

Many of you know that this year has been quite a challenge for us – physically, emotionally, mentally, financially… in every aspect of our lives it has been challenging. I honestly thought I was on a better path and that 2015 was going to be my GREAT year – full of process, recovery, fun. In many ways, it has… but it many ways, it has not.

Here’s what 2015 has taught me so far: take each day as it comes.

I’m a planner. I’m a detail oriented person. I’m a “type A” person. I’m a “black or white; no grey area” person. I’m a control freak. I’m the crazy mom.

The last few years have been quite a struggle, especially with my type of personality. Each day is unexpected. Most days, I don’t know how I’m going to “feel” or how the day will go. I’m getting better at “predicting” an off day, but I’ll never be perfect. Today, might be a good day but it might not. Today, I might get to eat real food but I also might have to stick with some plain ol’ chicken broth if I end up having a bad day. Today, I might get to laugh, tell jokes or stories and catch up with loved ones, but I also might have to cut out early and rest. Either way, I’m okay with it. Today is whatever it is… whatever it brings.

I’m always asked, “How are you doing?” Not just in passing, but with sincere concern. Often times I just say “I’m okay.” Each day is different – heck, each hour is different. I might not feel good but I know that this is something that I’ll be dealing with for the rest of my life – more than likely. So I’m okay. I’m not happy, I’m not sad, I’m not angry, I’m not mad… I’m okay. Tomorrow, I’ll be okay. Yesterday, today and tomorrow, I’m thankful and I’m okay.

While I have accomplished a lot this year – mostly new, health/blog related endeavors – my biggest accomplishment has been growth. I’ve learned to trust in God and his plans – even if I can’t see the end result or if it wasn’t what I planned. I’ve learned to be thankful for each second of each day. My health has scared me enough lately that I don’t want to take ANYTHING for granted. I’ve learned to have faith. I’ve learned to love life…even if it isn’t pretty all the time.

Thank you for your thoughts, prayers and kindness this year – there’s not a day I don’t say a prayer of thanks for you all.

Thank you to my husband for sticking things out with me and always going along with whatever is thrown our way. Never in my wildest dreams think that we would be building a home, a bakery and living in an RV in rural SEK. I know it’s crazy, but it’s OUR crazy and I love it.

Thank you to my children for always being that reason I smile each day. They are my greatest inspiration and reason for living.

Thank you to my family for all their support and love. Our holiday traditions are changing due to my health. My mom is consciously thinking about what she’s putting into her “famed” foods. My mother-in-law even decided to skip the homemade bread and rolls (since those are my favorites) so I wouldn’t have to be around as much “unsafe” foods. (Don’t worry, I made some gluten-free rolls that look amazing!). Thank you to my siblings, in-laws, everyone who is making adjustments for me. I know it’s hard, but it is very much appreciated – even if I still have to bring a sack lunch to dinner and eat away from everyone.

Thank you to everyone who has supported me and my new endeavors. All of your bakery orders, book purchases, website shares, etc are SO appreciated. It’s so nice to be a part of a great community. I can’t wait for everything to get completely finished so that I can completely fulfill that pipe dream of running my own bakery business and help anyone needing some tasty, allergy-friendly foods 🙂

Thank you for reading this. Thank you for thinking of us during this difficult year. Thank you for everything.

I wish each and every one of you a blessed, fulfilling and Happy Thanksgiving. As hard as times may be, there’s always a reason to give thanks and I hope you are blessed with many reasons, all year long.

 

2 thoughts on “A time for thanks….

  1. Brandie nading says:

    Your an amazing person, great mom, wonderful daughter and I’m sure a great wife. Ur family is lucky to have you. We all have bad and good days. Mine might not be like urs but I know and understand how u feel. Mine might not be due to foods but even today I woke up thankful for what I have even if I’m dealing with another migraine like I always do. We all have something we have to deal with in life. Your more then amazing and have been through so much. God is at your side and is watching over you and your family. I pray that things will get better for u. I have known outside since u was pregnant with lane. Your a sweet person and so caring. I wish u a happy thanksgiving from my family to yours!’
    I’m always here if u need anything

    • crstultz says:

      Thanks so much for the kind words Brandi! We all have our own struggles to deal with daily and I know you all are no different. I appreciate your thoughts and prayers more than you know! Have a great holiday season yourself! 🙂

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